Kink Friendly Law

Archive for the ‘Risks’ Category

Kinky Americans, are not the only sexually adventurous types to need to heed the old adage, “don’t try this at home!” Recently a UK kinkster, after consuming seven (7) pints of lager and one vodka & coke, decided the sure fire way to sexual self-gratification was once he’d return home, to remove his clothing, tie himself naked to a tree and for the coup de grace, tie a loop around his penis. Sometime during the cold evening, probably after reality reared its ugly head, he realized that his self-bondage wasn’t the best idea. Unfortunately he had made his rope bindings too secure and was unable to free himself.  Read the rest of this entry »

Anyone involved in BDSM or for that matter any kinky practice knows there are implements and devices involved. Which are often times expensive. Leading many practitioners to adapt and improvise common household products in ways their manufactures could never fathom.  This inventive spirit doesn’t always produce the desired results! Read the rest of this entry »

When most people hear the word “risks” they might immediately think of physical risks or dangers. For individuals involved in BDSM that is certainly a fact we all live with. However there are also other risks associated with our lifestyle, risks that are seldom discussed openly but are very much present.

These are the emotional and personal risks that are still a fact of life for many involved with BDSM. Whether they be fears of being “outed” to family, friends or an employer to the very real fear of having DFCS (Department of Family and Child Services) investigate your life regarding your fitness to continue raising your children.

It’s sad, in this day and age that consenting adults are still forced to conceal aspects of their life and personality from family, friends and employers for fear of being branded a pervert or worse.

Recently a friend of mine and a very active member of our local community abruptly withdrew from the lifestyle altogether saying that most likely they would never return. And while I’m not privy to their exact reasons, my suspicions are that they were threatened with being outed. In fact I know of at least three others who have had to either withdraw or further hide their activities from family and friends. It is sad that our only recourse when threatened by being outed, is to take a chance and hope the damage is controllable and nothing more than a little public embarrassment; and not the loss of a job, children or being disowned. Or, you can withdraw from the lifestyle pretending that an entire facet of your life and personality no longer matters or even exists. Pretending that you no longer have certain feelings or desires, and certainly you no longer have an outlet for your feelings or desires either. So your choice is to either cower before the threat left to wonder through life unhappy and unfulfilled; or take your chances.

As an assistant district attorney i face the very real chance of being fired if my participation in BDSM ever came to light. Thankfully, I live and play far from the judicial circuit where I practice law. That and the fact that I’m careful and very discrete keep me from always looking over my shoulder, wondering who is around. Having been confronted once and threatened with dire consequences and emotionally forced to cease my involvement in BDSM; I never want to be forced to make a choice like that again. During my eight year absence, I literally did wonder through life, completely unhappy and miserable. And it took a threat of another kind, the discovery of a life threatening illness that awakened me and made me realize that life is exceedingly dreary without personal happiness and emotional fulfillment.